How To Win Friends And Influence People - A Personal Analysis
...makes in reference to his book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Carnegie proposes that there are four main ideas that one should use when dealing with people: 1) Know how to handle people, 2) Make people like you, 3) Win people to their way of thinking, and 4) Be a leader. These skills are essential not only in being a good manager, but also in dealing with people in day to day life.
1) Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
The first thing one must know when handling people is "don't criticize, condemn, or complain." When you criticize someone, you put yourself at a level above them. Even if you get your point across, the only thing that will come of the situation is that the other person will have a feeling of remorse and you will have bruised their self-esteem. Often times I've been involved in group projects in school where I have been paired up with people who have a very different method of doing things. I tend to think that my way of doing things is the most efficient; however I don't shoot down the ideas of others. Rather, I try to understand where they were coming from and find a way work together. This is exactly the point that Carnegie is trying to get across.
The next tip is "give honest and sincere appreciation." A recurring theme in this book, is that people want to feel like they are important. There is a driver forcing you to do everything in life. For example, as a chairperson of the Business Week publicity committee, I am working hard to promote the Business Week activities and increase attendance using creative tactics. When people show up to events because of a promotion I created, it makes me feel important and gives me a sense of fulfillment. Such is the case when dealing with others. If they know they are appreciated, they will feel important and will continue doing a good job in the future.
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